Monday, December 15, 2008
Reading the interview with RUI EN on LIFE! today on Straits Times has really made me understand her more. And there are more common things between us. We need to accept ourselves a little bit more as we get older.
I ain't 100% accepted myself, but I am trying very hard to reach that 100%. I always feel like an outsider looking in, be it at home or outside. Except when I'm with my very good friends, which is less than 10. You don't need to have a group of very good friends/best friends/close friends, just a few will do. Because not all of them will stick thru thick and thin with you until you grow old, only a handful. What RUI EN said in the whole article is so very true.
Now. I have more quotes from RUI EN that really gets to me.
- "Many people say no when asked if they would change anything about their lives. Well, I would change the first 24 years of my life." (For me of course, it wouldn't be first 24 years of my life as I'm not that age yet, though I feel more like her age).
- "I used to be really angsty. That's the thing I like about getting older. You accept yourself a little bit more. I used to hate myself." (Well, I still hate myself, but not as much. And I gotta learn to accept myself a little bit more each day).
- "I was looking for ways to fill the emptiness that I felt." (People are always looking for ways to fill the emptiness in them, including me).
- ["I didn't want to be a victim anymore. I didn't want to use my broken family as an excuse for my bad behaviour anymore. I had to grow up." -> So she quit smoking and drinking. She quit wanting to be famous and popular. And most significantly for her career, she quit doing kissing and intimate scenes.] (Taken from the article, well actually, all of the quotes are. This was the time around 2004, therefore, since then no more kissing and intimate scenes were seen in her characters. And the result of that decision is that her opportunities now are very much limited, because generally, such kissing scenes are required.) < -> (Nevertheless, she will have us, ardent fans and supporters of hers. I know there are fans of hers, me included, who still hope for that slight possibility of just a kissing scene that is more than a peck on the cheeks or lips, but whatever her decision, we'll still support her. As for me, I still smoke and drink, BUT OCCASIONALLY).
- "I don't understand why people are fearful of being alone. I love being alone." (One more thing in common between us. Just that there are times I don't want to be alone, but very seldom. I'm actually alone most of the time, like 90% of the time when I'm home).
- Also, she seems to have a fear of relationships. Currently single, she says she regrets all the romantic relationships she had till now and admits she might never get married.
"My mother is quite upset and has said to me, 'Please don't use us as an example'. But when you grow up in that environment, you become careful. I would rather not put my welfare or my fate in the hands of somebody else."
Then why did she do this heart-to-heart interview, which certainly requires a great amount of trust?
"I am hoping that kids who read this might realize that no matter how bad your family situation is, you have a choice not to be a victim," she says. (I, for one, am trying not to be a victim, though my situation is somewhat different from hers. I don't know my dad, but saw a pic of him before. It's ok to ask me about my dad, though I don't know him. And you don't have to apologize when I say I don't have a dad, because I simply don't know him).
Ok. Maybe I wrote a little too much. But this is what I feel. I just had to let it out. Plus, I haven;t been blogging about my personal life. But, this is my blog and I'll blog what I want. How personal? Well, up to me. That's all for now! :)
Naomi Tan Dallee blogged at
2:14 PM
